Dear Sara
by lakariana
Summary: After the end of Season Two, Rip finds he's not used to being alone anymore and sends Sara a series of messages keeping them connected through time and space as he works out who he is now. Lots of Rip Hunter and some Sara Lance introspection. AU as I can't make this work with time broken


...

 **Disclaimer:** I don't own any characters or ideas from DC Legends of Tomorrow or the DC multiverses. One other dedication in the author's note at the end.

 **Author's Note** : I noticed how Rip called Sara by her first name much more than everyone else, except maybe Stein. They were certainly closer to each other than the rest of the team and were each other's source of strength in many episodes, so I thought they might miss each other post Season Two and this fic was born. AU as time didn't break (this story wouldn't work if it did).

Warning: Fluff, angst some h/c ahead.

…

"Captain Lance?"

"Yes Gideon?"

"We have just passed a Time Master outpost."

"Oh do you think we need to stop to check it out?"

"Not unless you wish to Captain. I am just informing you because I took the liberty of scanning for any updates or useful items."

"Good work, I take it you found something?"

"A message for you."

"For me?"

"From Captain Hunter."

"... can you wait for me to get to my quarters and then play it?"

"Of course Captain"

….

"Er, Hello Sara. Well this is awkward and embarrassing," the image of Rip said as he rolled his eyes at himself. "I've only ever received these sorts of messages before, I suppose this is some form of Karma." Sara watched as the hologram of Rip Hunter flickered slightly as he looked to the heavens, asking for strength. "So," he said too loudly, his gaze dropping back to hers. She knew logically he couldn't see her but she felt a little thrill when his eyes found hers. He must have just imagined her there when he'd recorded the message and aimed his eyes at the correct level for her height, but still she met his gaze and smiled back as if he was really in the room with her. "Hopefully Gideon has informed you of this little outpost, think of it as a time bubble. It's not quite like the Vanishing Point, it does exist within time, but it runs on approximately the same linear time as the Vanishing Point and therefore the Waverider. Two months for you would be somewhat equivalent to two months here," he explained, falling into the now familiar speech rhythms of his lecture mode. "Why am I telling you this? Well so that you know you can always contact me via this place should you require my help or… guidance. Not that I assume you'll need to of course. You've more than demonstrated your capabilities, but I've said all that before."

"Yes you have, but it's always nice to hear," Sara said as the hologram Rip took a deep breath.

"The benefits of this site means you needn't worry about our messages being picked up out of order or by ourselves in a timeframe that shouldn't be hearing them... Time travel problems," he shrugged with a dismissive smile. "I will leave messages here for you when I can, you don't have to feel obligated to collect them, but I find myself… I don't know, feeling lonely? I am missing the team, which seems absurd, but it's true. At some point I've stopped being able to function as a lone Time Master... maybe I never really did. I always knew I had Miranda and Jonas, but now... Now things are different. I'm sure this is why having families or any attachments to other people, was so discouraged by the Time Masters."

"Then come home," Sara muttered, frustrated he wasn't physically in front of her so she could shake him or smack him for being stupid.

"Now I am starting to ramble, so I will sign off, but I hope you and the team are well and not in the middle of too much chaos. Until next time." The hologram nodded at her looking both happy and uncomfortable before the image of Rip blipped out of existence.

"Should I play the message again?" Gideon asked politely.

"No thank you Gideon, but erm, gimme a second? I wanna think of what to say back."

….

"Hello Sara, I'm not sure if you stopped at the outpost or if Gideon just scans for messages but when you do you should find some useful parts and equipment. I er, found a wrecked time ship and have cannibalized it. Hopefully anything Gideon can't replicate should be here, if not, leave me a message and I'll keep an eye out for whatever you need. Speaking of which I forgot to tell Jax the Waverider's peripheral lines need a refit soon, they took a battering in World War One."

He was being all business this time and Sara couldn't help feeling disappointed. She'd been excited to hear Rip had left another message for her, but she'd been silly to assume it would be another personal letter and not just a progress report.

"Er, so I guess that's all I have to say," Rip said awkwardly. Sara watched expectantly, a slow smile slipping over her face as her old Captain didn't sign off and shifted his feet instead. "Thank you for your message Sara, it was really good to hear from you. I, er, I'm relieved to hear you and the team are all well... Be careful when you go to 2031, there was a lot of tension then about metahumans, it might be safer to leave, Mr Heywood, Mr Jackson and Professor Stein on board if you are still planning to see to the aberration there."

"Thanks, that would have been good to know before we went there," Sara sighed.

"You've probably already been there," Rip also sighed. "Well I'll be anxious now until I hear from you again."

Sara's smile grew wider.

"Ok. Until next time."

…..

"Hello Sara, you're going to laugh at me but, I did something I've always wanted to do but never did because… rules. I went to watch The Beatles perform at the Cavern Club in 1961."

Sara laughed, but it was more at his confessional tone than the statement itself. He shifted side on and averted his eyes and she tried to walk around the hologram to face him again but the image only distorted forcing her to wait patiently for him to turn back to her.

"I nearly turned back twice," he sighed. "It was packed, what if my being there meant someone else couldn't attend? What if I blocked someone's view who should have seen the performance?"

Sara rolled her eyes.

"I was stood at the back trying not to bump into anyone and this young woman with bright red hair starts talking to me as she's clearing tables. No idea of half of what she said, ingestible translators don't work on Scouse, but I thought I heard _what's the point if you don't have fun?"_

Rip's expression changed, like a shade had been pulled down in front of his face and Sara nearly asked Gideon if the hologram was malfunctioning before biting her tongue when his haunted eyes met hers.

"It was like being struck by lightning. I heard my own voice in my head, w _hoever knew time travel would be so much fun_ _._ That's what I said to Thawne after I killed General Washington," Rip confessed, his voice full of self loathing.

Sara had always been a woman of actions rather than words, even before shipwrecks and islands and the league of assassins. So being forced to just stand helplessly and witness her friend in pain without being able to do anything was killing her. She couldn't even talk to him. This was why telephones and Skype had been invented for God's sake. How come the stupid Time Masters hadn't come up with a better communication system than this?

"I don't know how long I got lost in my memories, all the pain and blood I created with _my_ hands. The things I did, and I didn't even _care._ My face must have been a picture because next thing I know I'm sat on the floor behind the bar and the red head is flapping her dishrag at me. She started scolding me, still not sure what she was actually saying, then she pressed a warm beer into my hand and patted my head and went back to serving drinks. I sat on the floor and listened to 1960s Liverpool happen a foot away, on the other side of the bar counter, and those words kept going around my head. _Whoever knew time travel would be so much fun._ " Rip eyes had fallen into the half distance but they snapped back onto hers with that disconcerting ability he had to find her despite the time and space between them.

"I felt paralysed. That's why I was there wasn't it? There wasn't an aberration or a threat to the timeline. I just went because I wanted to. To have fun." Then he smiled and Sara sighed with relief because it wasn't the insincere sarcastic smile of the man that killed her, it was the self deprecating one of the man she admired. "But of course my red haired angel hadn't forgotten me. _A'right now Chuck? Get it down you."_ Sara frowned at the odd voice he put on and Rip himself laughed at his poor attempt at the accent.

"I obediently drank my pint, which was horrible, and she smiled at me and winked. The entire time my mind was altered no one ever looked at me like that. Everyone I met knew something was wrong, could sense I was a threat, but she was fine with me sitting there staring at the back of her knee high boots. She found it funny."

Sara raised an eyebrow at that.

"I had an epiphany on that sticky floor Sara. I was right, time travel could be fun, but I'd be damned if the only way I experienced it was as that man." As he spoke the brightness returned to his expression. Hope reignited, that's what she was seeing and her heart brightened to match it.

"So I ordered another pint, gave the barmaid a big tip… and I had fun. Ended up spending half the night with some off duty policemen, they really knew how to let their hair down. Why am I telling you all this? Think I'm still a bit drunk now, I wonder if this counts as a drunk dial?"

Rip Hunter letting it loose in 60s England and she missed it. Sara pouted wondering if there was some way to find photographic evidence.

"I would recommend the place to you and the team Sara, if I could trust you not to start a bar fight, which I can't, so stay away from the Cavern Club," His face creased with uncertainty again. "I haven't noticed any time disturbances because of my actions, you will let me know if anything comes up?"

"No, because it won't," she told the hologram.

"Right well I really need to fall unconscious now. Until next time."

….

"Hello Sara, I don't know what to think about your last message. Everything may have worked out but you can't take historical figures on trips through the timeline, even if it is their birthday. Never mind, you'll do as you please no matter what I say, won't you?"

"Yes," Sara replied to the hologram. "And if you're going to be like that I won't tell you what we're doing."

"I shudder to think about what you don't tell me in these messages," Rip sighed. "I do appreciate them though, I'm sure you're keeping busy and I do have every faith in you."

And just like that she stopped being annoyed with him. Sara wasn't sure how he managed it. She's working up her anger and then he says something nice like that and she forgets about punching him in the face. That was probably why people always got a whack in before letting him speak.

"Speaking of which, what have _I_ been up to?" Rip's image continued. "I visited the time period I was born in. Not sure why. God, it smelt terrible. You know that thing about smell being the strongest link to memory? Well I do not remember East London ever smelling that bad. So, I was just wandering around taking in the smog filled air, unsanitary brick buildings and dangerous locals," he said sarcastically. "When I felt a tug on my coat. Some little blighter was trying to pick my pocket! Squealed bloody murder when I grabbed him. It wasn't me, before your imagination runs away with you, I wouldn't be that foolhardy. It was still like looking in a scrawny wretched mirror though." The image of Rip rubbed his eyes tiredly. "What am I doing Sara?" he asked.

"You're looking trying to find yourself dummy," Sara muttered at the hologram. "At the rate you're going you'll have enough to write an inspirational novel people can read on airplanes. Science fiction's Eat Pray Love. I bet Nate would ghost write it for you."

The hologram froze with Rip pinching his eyes shut.

"Did you want me to record that as your reply Captain?" Gideon asked.

"Nah, it's alright Gideon. He should work it out for himself don't you think?" Sara replied to the ceiling.

The message restarted and Rip pulled himself to stand to attention and gave her his quiet smile.

"Well I've gone on long enough. No more trips for non team members," he ordered sternly. "Until next time." The image faded leaving Sara alone and feeling oddly colder without the blue flickering light.

"Gideon?"

"Yes Captain?" The friendly voice answered.

"Is that some kind of Time Master joke? The _until next time_?"

"I'm not sure what you mean," the computer replied, her voice humming slightly with what Sara guessed was her program's facsimile of amusement. Sara pulled a face at the ceiling.

….

"Hello Sara, I did something stupid."

Sara would have made a sarcastic comment or scoffed, but Rip looked genuinely upset and she unconsciously stepped towards the image of him only realising she was reaching out to reassure him at the last second and withdrawing her hand with an embarrassed jerk. The image didn't respond to her of course. She forced herself to remember this was a recording, an image from the past. She couldn't help this Rip, this Rip didn't exist anymore. Gideon had said this message was from over a week ago, he'd have moved on to the next problem by now. At least she hoped he had.

"I knew it was a bad idea even as I was doing it. Miranda looked so beautiful and Jonas… Jonas was so happy."

"Ah crap Rip," Sara groaned.

"I didn't talk to them I just stalked them around the park. I'm surprised no one called the law officials on me. I… I think she saw me. Miranda always was smarter than me. Did I tell you she was supposed to be a captain? She gave it up for me. I was so desperate to be worth her sacrifice, I threw myself into being the best captain I could be… but it wasn't really about me. It was for Jonas, there's no way we'd have been allowed a child if Miranda had been in active service. Seeing them again, it hurt a lot. I have a much better appreciation for what Mr Rory went through with Mr Snart. It's difficult to reconcile the fact that they are gone when you can see them right in front of you, but… I think I have reconciled it Sara. I watched them playing on that perfect sunny day in the park and that day will always exist, they will always be happy and safe on that one day, but for us that day is in the past. Does that make sense? I'm sorry to burden you with my issues, if you ever need a ear please know I will be there and don't worry, I learned my lesson. I won't be visiting my family again. Until next time.

"Until next time Rip," Sara replied, feeling a little overwhelmed by the contents of his latest message. Not the words themselves, though they were heartbreaking, but how comfortable he had been sharing his pain and thoughts with her. When was the last time someone had been so open when talking to her? As if knowing she was going to listen to him sometime in the future was enough to comfort him. She pledged to herself to take him up on the offer to return the favour. She'd tried keeping all the demons and doubts inside before and it had only led her further into darkness. If Rip Hunter could open up and talk feelings then Sara Lance certainly could. She wasn't going to let the ex-Time Master out do the White Canary. She wouldn't admit that the knowledge he would listen at some point in the future was a comfort to her too.

….

"Hello Sara, I'm afraid I have bad news," Rip spoke with fast clipped tones, his body leaning forward as if trying to reach her. "I bumped into some other Time Master captains. We destroyed the Vanishing Point without letting anyone know what we were doing or what the Time Council had been doing to the world, to history, and there are those that are very angry with us. Maybe they would have been angry even if they had known. You _must_ be careful Sara. Don't trust any other time travellers or time ships. I have some loose ends to wrap up, I don't know if… I hope you get this Sara. Stay safe. Keep the team safe…. Until next time."

"Rip no. Wait. What happened?" Sara demanded uselessly. The recording of course didn't respond and faded away to nothing. "Play it again Gideon." Sara ordered.

She watched it three times over, but couldn't glean any clues or hidden messages. What the hell was that? Time travelling people from the future were after them for revenge and Rip was off to _tie up loose ends?_ She didn't care what he said next time she was going to punch him for worrying her like this.

"Gideon, call everyone to the bridge. I've got bad news to pass on," she said through her teeth.

"Right away Captain."

…..

They had been chased through the Temporal Zone and only got away because Ray had risked flying outside in his suit and sabotaging their pursuer's ship from the outside. Even after whoever was chasing them fell randomly into history, they couldn't relax because getting Ray back onto the Waverider without losing him too had been really hairy.

As the rest of the team celebrated behind her, Sara sat in the Captain's chair her hand like a vice around the arm rest unable to relax. How many more were still after them? Mick had explained how these left over Time Masters were able to find them within the temporal zone, his time as Chronos proving useful again. Is that why Rip thought it was OK to leave them alone in his world? Because he thought Mick "Heat Wave" Rory would get them through the futuristic time travel related crap? What a joke.

Why the hell had she agreed with him when he left? Just because she didn't want him to take back over as Captain? Or the opposite, did she still think of him as _her_ Captain and so felt like he knew what was best? She scoffed at herself for even thinking that, she had always been first to call him out on his crap. He'd manipulated her, fed her a bunch of flattery so he could run away from the difficult situation on the ship and she had eaten it up. Screw you Rip Hunter, she thought viciously, but even in her mind her anger wasn't convincing. She was worried about him. They had just scraped through this attack and that was with the whole team pitching in. How was he managing on his own and against his old friends and comrades?

"Gideon can you tell if anyone is tracking us right now?" she asked.

"Scans are not picking up any time ships in our wake Captain, but those monitoring outside the Temporal Zone will be harder to locate," the computer answered. Sara frowned.

"We'll have to risk it, take us to the outpost. We need to meet up with Rip and it's as good a place as any to hide for now."

Rip wasn't at the outpost and neither was a message from him. Sara tried to hide it, but if the way the rest of the team avoided her was any clue, she didn't do a good job of disguising her frustration. They waited a couple of days before they were forced to leave by an aberration in colonial India which was, of course, a trap. They saved the day, just, and only because the Time Masters were arrogant snobs who thought _primitives_ like them couldn't pose a threat. They'd taught them a lesson. No one would underestimate the Legends again.

Sara took them straight back to the outpost. No message from Rip and her last message still sitting there gathering virtual dust. The punching bag took serious damage for the next few days.

….

"Hello Sara, I know this is later than I usually leave my messages, I'm sorry, er, unforeseen circumstances."

Sara's initial relief at Gideon announcing Rip had finally left a message were doused the second she saw him. The idiot had gotten himself injured and he was trying to hide it from her. Sara stared at the hologram, a flash of irritation filling her which was then replaced by worry which was rapidly replaced by irritation again.

"I got your messages, good work escaping the others. The attacks should ease off somewhat now. I've erased records of the Waverider and our actions at the Vanishing Point, so it'll be harder for them to link the destruction to us or find us in the Temporal Zone."

He was sat down on what looked like a metal crate, every time he shifted tiny creases of pain would appear around his eyes and the edges of his mouth. She couldn't see an injury, so something internal or judging from his posture, something on his chest hidden under his coat.

"I'm glad you weren't injured, that no one on the team was hurt. I bet the other Time Captains counted themselves as far superior. I hope you taught them a lesson."

"This is just an image of Rip in the past," Sara said to herself. "This Rip doesn't exist anymore." Maybe because he's dead, her traitorous mind supplied. Probably sat there and died all alone. It's probably what he wanted, the melodramatic maudlin ass. She was really trying to be angry with him but her heart was beating too fast, her adrenaline fueling her anxiety instead of her annoyance. No matter what he thought, he doesn't deserve to suffer alone. If Sara had him in front of her for real she'd be forcibly telling him that.

If only you had a time machine you could go back to when he dropped the message and check on him, she snarked at herself. Her mind locked and jerked in indecision about what to do. Help him. Punch him in face and then help him. Be there with him. So what if he doesn't want you to? What does he know? You know you should be there, especially if he thinks you shouldn't be.

"Arg! Fine," Sara yelled at herself. "Gideon! Plot us a course back to-" Her voice disappeared out the door with her as she ran for the bridge leaving the message playing.

"I bet you're angry with me," the hologram smiled to the now empty room. "I promise I didn't try to get hurt. It's ironic actually, I was thinking of asking to come back, rejoin the team." Rip laughed. "I guess I jinxed-"

"Rip!"

The hologram jumped and spun in his seat to look behind him, wincing in pain as he did so.

"Sara?"

"Hello Rip," the new Captain of the Waverider said off screen, the sarcasm more than evident in her tone without needing to see her face.

"I was just leaving you a message," Rip said dumbly. A pair of feminine hands appeared within the field of the hologram recording and flicked his coat open to reveal the blood stained shirt and jacket underneath. Rip hissed and tried to bat the hands away but one of them slapped him lightly on the cheek making him hold still while the other continued to probe the wound.

"I know dumbass, how do you think we're here? Dammit Rip! This is half healed and infected, you probably got space cooties in it," Sara huffed, her face finally appearing along side his in the blue flickering light as she studied his eyes for signs of more widespread infection.

"There's no such thing as space cooties," Rip said tiredly.

"Maybe not, but you'd still manage to catch them," Sara replied. There was a commotion outside the projection's field of light and Sara disappeared again as she stood up to look. Her hand stayed resting against his shoulder, close to his neck without touching the skin. "Mick! I found him over here," her voice echoed out.

"He doesn't look that bad," Mick's gruff voice called out, getting louder as he got nearer. "I don't know why we had to rush over here in a panic."

"A panic?" Rip asked. Sara's hand slapped him gently again and he shut up.

"Can you walk?" Mick asked, apparently stood next to the former Captain now.

"I should be able to, with some er, assistance?" Rip said looking sideways at the larger man. Mick's large arm slipped around one of his shoulders, Sara's slimmer one going around the other. The recording paused, Rip Hunter's face frozen with his eyes shut, his face a picture of calm acceptance as the arms of his teammates supported him. Gideon closed the recording with a satisfied electronic blip the image fading gently away. She made a backup copy and stored it in her operating system's interface files before turning her attention to the medbay and readying it for her Captain's return.

….

 **Author's Note:** Look at that, I seem to be a time canary shipper. This could be read as friendship I guess. Sorry if Rip is OOC but the point was to show him growing as a character, releasing some demons and opening up. (Which is not really something he does well on the show, I hope he does in Season Three though, poor guy has been through a hell of a lot.)

-The red haired lady at the Cavern was Cilla Black in my head. If you don't know who she is, she was a music and TV icon in the UK and really did work at the Cavern in the 60s.

\- I know it's not comic canon but I like to think little Rip came from Jack the Ripper era Whitechapel. Cut purse is a pretty old fashioned term.

I hope it wasn't too sappy and you enjoyed reading it. Please leave me a review and let me know. Thank you for reading.


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